Someone asked me if I ever worry about going broke. The answer is an unequivocal YES.
It’s been two years since I’ve been working for myself full-time. And cashflow still seems pretty unpredictable.
Sometimes I don’t have enough work. Sometimes I have more work than I can handle.
Some months I don’t make enough income. Others I make more than I need. (Having multiple income streams helps to even this out.)
***
Winter is the slowest time of year for my business. It has been this way ever since I starting speaking and consulting as a side hustle in 2008. While it was all fine and good to have a dip in income when I had a full-time job, now that I work for myself it scares the hell out of me.
When too many weeks go by without me getting a hefty enough check, these are the kinds of things that go through my head.
Oh my God, it’s been 2 weeks. I’m never going to get another client ever in life.
Maybe my prices are too high. Maybe they’re too low.
What’s wrong with people? Why aren’t they buying my stuff? My books are useful! My speaking inspires new ideas! My coaching sessions help people move to the next level! Right? Right?!
***
Despite the fear, I make myself keep going. I make myself do one thing every day, even if it’s just writing a blog post, sending an email, or following up with a new connection.
I should be familiar with fear by now – the panicky feeling in the pit of my stomach, the lingering sense of dread when I get up some mornings, wondering if I’ll make a sale or book a client or get a check in the mail. I know how debilitating it can be. Right now at this very moment, there’s a big project on my plate that I haven’t worked on for months, even though I know that finishing it will mean a new source of income for my business.
Fear is brutal when you let it beat you. And the fact is, sometimes it wins. But sometimes, you do. Either way, the battle has to be fought on a daily basis.
As an entrepreneur, I’ve learned that both success and failure are impermanent. If business was a boxing match, you would never win the belt. On Monday, you might get a few jabs in, but by Thursday you’re up against the ropes. On Friday, you wake up feeling bruised and groggy, yet lucky you get to live to fight another day.
***
When I’m centered enough to sit still and breathe, this is my mantra during the rough patches.
Fear flows through me but it is not me. I am bigger than fear. I am beyond fear. Fear does not define me. I am not fear.
When I take care of myself enough to think clearly, I do what I know works.
I create. I serve. I connect.
I blog. I network. I ask for the sale.
I remember that there is no “can’t.”
The universe does the rest.


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This is what I look like in Hawaii. How did I get here? A very nice client flew me and my co-author out to speak at their conference and I decided to stay on for three weeks. So far, it’s been an amazing time. I’ve been getting so much love from people here.
Hotels are really expensive, especially for 21 nights! The conference organizers put me up in a fancy Westin hotel for three nights that of course, I couldn’t afford to stay at long-term. So, on the recommendation of a friend from high school who still lives in Honolulu, I made arrangements to stay at the 
I’m not doing all the tourist stuff while I’m here like luaus or island tours, since I’ve lived and visited here before. The beach is enough of a tourist sight for me! So beautiful. And free! But I’ve also been able to find free social events as well, so I don’t feel totally alone here and I can mingle with other people my age. Before I left, I had scoped out some upcoming networking events and free cultural happenings, so I had a few things on my calendar already. Then, a few people at the conference told me about a few more sights to check out while I’m here. Today, I went to Ala Moana to watch a Hawaiian Christmas performance with hula girls which was really good. Last night, I had a blast at the
For the first few days I was here, I spent most of my time with people I knew from the conference who were here from the mainland. I also made plans to hang out with my high school friend who lives on the island. But I was actually invited out to First Friday by new people I met at the conference. I ended up meeting them for dinner and drinks at this cool vegan-friendly diner called 
Rosetta Thurman is a nationally-recognized author, speaker, mentor and coach dedicated to helping women create their ideal lives.