How to Decide the Next Step in Your Career

August 26, 2013 | By Rosetta |

A few years ago, I was facilitating a training and one of the participants asked me, “So, Rosetta, what’s next for you?” I had no answer because at the time, I was wondering the same thing myself! I love the term “infinite possibility” but when you have several different paths you can take, it can be difficult to pick one and move forward. Here I was, trying to help this group of leaders figure out how to get to the next stage of their careers, and I wasn’t able to articulate where mine is going.

“I don’t know,” is what I said at the time. Soon after though, I went through a process to figure out what, exactly, I wanted to do next. Here are some ideas you might use in your own stage of discernment about where you want your career to go.

Identify Your Signature Strengths

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Two Ways to Set Effective Goals (VIDEO)

August 21, 2013 | By Rosetta |

In today’s video post, I share two simple, yet powerful strategies for setting effective goals. If you use these tips, they will help you get clear about your goal and push you to accomplish it faster.

In the video, I share the following goal-setting tips:

Be specific. (What exactly do you want to achieve?)

If you want to achieve any goal, it helps to be as specific as possible. Don’t be afraid to tell the universe exactly what you want! Remember that vague goals often produce vague results. For example, “I want to make more money” is a pretty vague goal. Everybody wants to make more money, right? But how MUCH more do you want to make? If you were to say, “I want to be earning $50,000 per year,″ that would be more specific. (And more inspiring as well!)

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How to Overcome the Fear of Success

August 19, 2013 | By Rosetta |

“We often hesitate to follow our intuition out of fear. Most usually, we are afraid of the changes in our own life that our actions will bring.” – Caroline Myss

Which one are you more afraid of: failure or success?

When it comes to following your dreams, do you worry more about not being able to cope with negative feelings when you mess up or not being able to handle the level of increased responsibility that success often brings? Most of us think we fall in the first camp of not wanting to fail. But many of us are actually more fearful of what might happen if we actually achieved that big goal we say we want.

It can be scary to think about all the different ways your life could change as a result of losing all the weight, making more money, attracting a great man, finding a better job, moving to an exciting new city, etc. Your friends might think you’ve “changed” (you have). Your family might doubt your drastic choices (they will). Your co-workers might be jealous of you (yup, that too).

But freedom comes when you are able to accept the truth that your own self-actualization is worth more than the discomfort you have to go through to get there. Here are two strategies to help you overcome the fear of success and step into the greatness that you were made for.

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Look Before You Leap: 4 Steps to Take Before You Quit Your Job to Work for Yourself

August 12, 2013 | By Rosetta |

Last week, I received this question via email from Jasmine, a new HBW reader:

“I see you quit your job and just took the leap – but how?”

I love being able to answer questions like this because I know it sounds both inspiring and confusing when I share that I quit my job almost 4 years ago to work for myself full-time. Some people read my story and assume that one random day, I just jumped up from my cubicle, shouted “I quit!” and never looked back. But the truth is, I spent years laying the groundwork before I left my job. I loved my nonprofit career and didn’t leave my organization in a huff. I did a bit of planning and hustling that allowed me to make the successful transition from employee to being self-employed. For starters, I began building my personal brand in my industry in 2007, launched a consulting business on the side in 2008, and had already secured two major clients by the time I handed in my resignation letter.

From all the emails and messages I receive, not to mention my work with private coaching clients, I know that many women want to make the move from 9 to 5 to full-time business. What might that journey look like for you? Here are four specific steps you can take right now to make the leap in a strategic, effective way.

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How to Break Free: My Nitty-Gritty Advice for Living the Life You Really Want (AUDIO)

August 9, 2013 | By Rosetta |

Last month, I was interviewed by Jessica, co-founder of GlobetrotterGirls about how I quit my job and started my business, minimalism, travel and my journey to location independence. She asked some great questions and got some VERY passionate answers out of me. I’m honored to share the full 50-minute audio recording of our conversation with you! (Just press the play button below.)

Here’s what Jessica had to say about our podcast interview:

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Five Ways to Expand Your Social Circle and Connect with Like-Minded Women

August 5, 2013 | By Rosetta |

Hosting a few entrepreneurial HBW for brunch at my place over the weekend, from L to R: Anilia (Motivated Sista), Tambra (Nativsol Kitchen), me!, Wilma (Living Happier After) and Monique (Brown Vegan)

“If your current friends don’t support your goals or resent your success, it’s time to make friends with people who are actually doing amazing things with their lives.” – paraphrased from Fabienne Fredrickson

One of the most difficult things about entrepreneurship is how lonely it can be. While I enjoy the freedom I have in working for myself, I have found it much harder to build my network as a self-employed professional than it was when I worked full-time at a nonprofit. I love my business, but I’ve also learned how important it is to put myself out there to connect with other motivated entrepreneurial women who are on a similar path. I know from experience that when you have a list of people you can call when you need help or just want to vent, it makes life a whole lot easier. Life is even more fulfilling when you have like-minded women around you that you can share victories with, whether it’s quitting your job, landing a new client or publishing your next book.

If you’ve been struggling to expand your social circle, consider these ideas on how to connect with like-minded women and grow your support network.

1. Attend local networking events.

Last week, I attended Client Attraction Founder Fabienne Fredrickson’s Mindset Tour stop in Reston, Virginia. I learned a lot from Fabienne’s ideas around changing your mindset so that you can earn more money in your business. I also met several inspiring, heart-centered entrepreneurs that are doing their part to help others with their products and services. Local networking events hosted by a business or organization are a great way for you to connect to (and follow up with) women in your area who have the same career or business interests as you do. Best of all, most of them are free or low-cost! Check online forums, blogs, your local newspaper or your city’s weekly community calendar for upcoming networking events.

2. Go to retreats and seminars.

I wrote about the incredible opportunity I had in attending the Project Getaway business retreat in Thailand earlier this year. It was a powerful experience for me to live in community with other location-independent entrepreneurs for almost a month. Of course, it didn’t hurt that we were in a tropical paradise! Retreats are typically hosted by organizations, authors, speakers, coaches or mentors over the course of a weekend/week/month in various locations around the world. The great thing about retreats is that you can combine them with a vacation or simply take a weekend away from home to get motivated and recharged to achieve your goals. With the Happy Black Woman Retreat this September in DC (2 spots left!), my goal is to cultivate a space for women to support each other on the journey to create our ideal lives and build businesses doing what we love. If you go to your favorite guru’s website, they will likely have an “events” page where you can find out how to register for their next retreat or seminar.

3. Find a Meetup group related to a hobby or interest you have.

I love Meetup groups and recommend them often. All you do is enter your location and choose a category on the Meetup website to find groups of people with certain interests or hobbies in your area. Even with me traveling and being a nomad these past few years, I’ve always been able to find a Meetup group in my city where I can connect with like-minded people. Although you’ve probably heard this suggestion before, you might think, “I’m just not a ‘go meet a bunch of strangers’ type of person.” Or maybe you’re even an extreme introvert like me. But if you’re looking to expand your social circle, why not plug in to a community that’s already been created for you? Consider that you’ll also expand your skills and experiences by learning from others in the group.

4. Join a book club.

If you love to read and want to meet other readers in your area, you can also find a wide range of book clubs on Meetup.com. Independent bookstores and chains like Barnes & Noble host weekly or monthly book discussion groups as well. If you wish, you can exchange contact information with others in the club to continue the conversation over coffee or dinner. The point is that you expand your social circle with women who enjoy taking part in the same activity that you like to do. You already know you’ll have something in common with the participants, especially if the club is focused on reading certain types of books.

5. Host an informal get-together at your home.

Have you noticed that your phone and face-to-face time with friends has decreased since the convenience of email, Facebook, Twitter, etc? I know I’m guilty of this myself. I definitely have to make the extra effort to schedule lunch, drinks or even just a Skype session with all of the amazing women I know. This past weekend, I took it a step further and invited a small group of entrepreneurial HBW over for brunch at my place. And wine. Lots of wine! Hosting an informal get-together at your home is a fantastic way to expand your social circle because you get to interact more deeply with a select group of women than you would at a crowded happy hour or noisy restaurant. Just go through your email contacts, list of Facebook friends or stack of business cards and I’m sure you’ll discover at least three interesting women you’d like to get to know a bit better.

You can never go wrong with good food and good wine!

For me, the commitment to reach out to others is the key to deepening my relationships with incredible women in my social circle. Even with my ongoing travel schedule and nomadic lifestyle, I know that I can always find people who can support me in the journey to not only grow my business, but to grow myself into the person I want to be.

Leave a comment below: Do you need to expand your social circle to include people who can support your goals? Share ONE thing you can do this week to connect with liked-minded women.

***

Rosetta Thurman is the Founder of Happy Black Woman, a supportive community that empowers women to create their ideal lives through personal development and entrepreneurship. Join thousands of women who have completed the only online course that gives you all the tools you need to get unstuck, set clear goals and rediscover who you truly are. Learn more about the 31 Days to Reset Your Life program here.

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How to Create an Inspiring Morning Routine

July 29, 2013 | By Rosetta |

Does your morning routine consist of staying in bed as late as possible while barely making it to work on time? If you’re like most people, your morning might go something like this:

Alarm goes off.
Hit the snooze button (at least three times).
Lie there and think about how much you don’t want to get up. Or moan and groan about how much you hate your job.
Shower.
Get dressed.
Run out the door with a honey bun (or nothing) in your hand.

With so many people starting their day off like this, it’s no wonder there’s constant grumbling in the mornings. How can anyone expect to have a great day when their morning routine is rushed and filled with negative thinking? Getting the day off on the wrong foot can sabotage your entire to-do list and prevent you from making progress on your goals. But what if you could change your life simply by developing an inspiring morning routine that sets you up for success?

About a year ago, I started to create my own morning practice that included healthy habits and positive thinking. As I began to follow this routine more and more, I noticed that not only was I feeling better mentally and physically, but that I was also able to focus on my goals and get more done throughout the day.

Here’s the outline of my own practice, with some tips for how you can incorporate this routine into your day as well:

1. Wake up one hour earlier. I don’t consider myself an early riser, but I do feel more inspired to get things done when I wake up before 8:00am. Set your alarm to go off an hour earlier than usual as you’ll need extra time to accommodate your new morning routine. Of course, going to bed earlier makes this task easier!

2. Get up immediately. Avoid lying there and thinking negatively about your day, life, job, challenges or anything else. Instead, get your head up off the pillow quickly before you convince yourself that five more minutes won’t hurt. It helps to place your alarm clock or phone on the other side of the room. That way, you’re actually forced to get up to turn it off.

3. Drink an 8-16 oz. glass of warm water with lemon. Or leave a bottle of water on your nightstand if that’s more convenient. Just be sure to get your water in as soon as you wake. You’ll feel less groggy and ready to get moving! Plus, it’s much easier to continue the act of drinking water throughout the day when you get a head start first thing in the morning.

4. Meditate or pray. Take 5-10 minutes to meditate or pray. Being still or spending time in worship will put you in the right mindset to face the day. My simple meditation process includes reading the daily passage from Mark Nepo’s The Book of Awakening, then sitting in silence on my yoga mat by the window.

5. Prepare a healthy breakfast. It’s hard to focus on your goals when you miss the most important meal of the day! Try a quick, nutritious meal each morning, Some of my favorite “ready in 10 minutes or less” breakfasts include: fruit smoothies, oatmeal with bananas and almond butter, scrambled eggs with sauteed kale or Greek yogurt topped with fresh fruit and granola.

6. Exercise for at least 15 minutes. Take a walk, jump on the treadmill, do a full workout in the gym, etc. It doesn’t matter what kind of exercise you do as long as you get your body moving! I’m not a big fan of the gym, but I enjoy taking walks in the morning as the whole world seems to wake up with the sun, especially the birds!

7. Shower and put on something that makes you feel good. Take a hot shower or warm bath after exercising. Choose one of your favorite outfits or wear a beloved piece of jewelry. For instance, I often wear a gold ring with a small rose engraved on it because it was a gift from my grandmother. Whenever I put on that particular ring, I feel her love and encouragement throughout the day.

This week, try to develop a morning routine that will help you to stay positive and focused. The practice outlined above will likely take you at least 60 minutes to complete. If that’s longer than you can spend, simply come up with an abbreviated version that works for you. For me, putting in the effort to develop an intentional morning routine has definitely had a significant impact on my productivity. Give it a try and see how it changes your day!

Leave a comment below: Do you have a morning routine? Which activities help to put you into a positive and productive frame of mind for the day?

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3 Ways to Stay Motivated and Productive on the Journey to Achieve Your Goals

July 22, 2013 | By Rosetta |

As Tony Robbins schooled us in my last post, taking action towards your dreams and goals is the best way to make powerful decisions. That being said, it’s a challenge to stay consistent and build momentum to that BIG success over time. How do you motivate yourself to continue working toward your goals day in and day out, especially when you face challenges? Although some of the following strategies will motivate you more than others, it’s good to experiment with different ways of finding your groove. Then, when the chips are down, you can get back on track without spending too much time feeling disappointed in yourself.

1. Commit to doing just one thing per week.

I talk a lot about taking baby steps because whenever you’re working toward a big goal, it’s critical to break it down into smaller pieces so that you actually feel like you can achieve it. One of the best ways to do this is to make a promise to yourself that you will do just one thing every week to move forward. This commitment is so simple to fulfill because no matter how busy you are, you surely can find the time over the course of an entire week to devote to your goal. For instance, if you’re unemployed and looking for a new job, your small step might be to submit just ONE really good job application each week or go to just ONE networking event in your city. The beauty of this strategy is that most of the time, you will actually end up doing MORE than just one thing because the act of taking one action naturally leads to another. Then, even on your “off” weeks when you’re not feeling it, you’ll still be productive and accomplish a little something vs. a lot of nothing.

2. Give yourself rewards and incentives for reaching certain milestones.

One thing I used to do back when I working at my job 40+ hours a week AND building my business on the side is to reward myself at the end of the week. For me, it was usually something simple like taking myself to a nice restaurant for dinner or giving myself permission to take a whole Saturday to stay in my pajamas and read/sleep/do absolutely nothing. I’m not one to shy away from hard work, but when I know there’s a treat waiting for me at the end of the race, it’s always easier to push myself to run a bit faster. You can schedule in all kinds of rewards and incentives for yourself depending on the goal. For example, if your goal is to earn an additional $1,000 in your business this month, your reward for achieving that might be to take the weekend off and go on a day trip to a spa or a winery.

3. Find an accountability partner.

Don’t be afraid to ask other people for support. This is still a personal growth area for me, but I’ve been getting some painful reminders that there’s only so much I can accomplish all by myself! Challenge yourself to find someone – ideally a mentor, colleague or coach – to help keep you on track with your goals in life and business. It’s amazing how easy it is for a year, five years, or even 10 years to go by and you still up there talking about how you’re “trying” to start a business, lose weight, get back into the dating game, etc. An accountability partner is someone you can check in with on at least a weekly basis either in person or over the phone to talk about your goals and the action steps you’re taking to achieve them.

I personally believe that you can do anything you want with your life, as long as you commit fully to the possibility of your own success through consistent action. The thing is, most of us already KNOW what we need to do to reach our goals. We know the steps, it’s just that we need help and a little kick in the butt to take action. It’s not always easy, but if you can stay motivated, you’ll reach whatever goal you set out to accomplish.

Leave a comment below: How do you stay motivated on the journey to pursue your goals? Have you used any of these strategies successfully or have other tactics worked better for you?

***

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How to Make Powerful Decisions

July 18, 2013 | By Rosetta |

“A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.” – Tony Robbins

Back in May, I announced my big decision to move away from the DC area to Hawaii, one of my favorite places in the whole world. Yet, even after making this decision, I procrastinated on actually taking ACTION on my relocation plans. I kept asking myself, am I really going to do this?! Fear and doubt plagued my mind even after I officially decided that I was ready to make the move. It was only a couple weeks ago that I finally bought a ONE-WAY ticket to Honolulu, Hawaii. I’m excited that October 26, 2013 will be the first day of my new island life!

Has this ever happened to you? You make a decision and then feel scared to actually follow through with it?

You may have made a decision in your head or even written it down in your journal or put it on your vision board. Whether it’s moving to another city, finding your dream job, starting your business or pursuing a new relationship, for some reason you just haven’t made any progress since then. But maybe you’re getting clear that NOW is the time to make good on that promise to yourself.

Your next step is to take a specific ACTION to get you on the path to achieving your goal. It’s not going to be easy, but the only way you’re ever going to make progress is with consistency. Here’s how…

Challenge Yourself to Think Less and Do More

It’s easy to get lost in your thoughts and plans and “research” (come on now, how many Google searches do you really need to do?), but you won’t achieve ANY of your goals by daydreaming alone. You will need to take some powerful action to get there! Success won’t just fall into your lap, no matter how much you wish for the easy button. Trust yourself enough to believe that the decision you’ve made is the right one. And then give yourself permission to make it happen.

Remember That Baby Steps are Still Steps

Your big dream may be a lofty, multi-year goal, which can feel daunting given where you are right now. But it doesn’t have to be so bad when you plan things out day by day in small, manageable tasks. Keep the bigger picture in mind, but break it down into baby steps you can take consistently. That way, when you achieve your small daily goals, you’ll build momentum without getting overwhelmed.

Believe Success is Possible for You (Even if You’ve Failed in the Past)

Most importantly, you need to believe in yourself. Many of us are literally afraid of success. We FEAR our own brilliance, which leads us to put off action toward our dreams indefinitely. The fear may never fully go away, but the truth that you CAN do this will eventually prevail in your mind. Don’t allow years to go by without even trying. Promise yourself that you will take action on your decision to do something extraordinary with your life. After that, all that’s left is for you to enjoy the journey!

Leave a comment below: What part of your life do you need to take action on right now? Tell me what goal you’re ready to get working on. I’d love to hear about where YOU know you need to go next!

***

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The Art of Minimalism: 5 Things Germany Taught Me About Living With Less

July 11, 2013 | By Rosetta |

Photo courtesy Pilar Harris

This is a guest post by Pilar Harris, a healthy lifestyle blogger in Los Angeles. Please welcome Pilar to the HBW Community!

I come from a very creative, woman-centric tribe of stylish black women who love to thrift shop and collect. Growing up, garage sales and flea markets were frequent happenings. I can recall my grandmother and aunties having several closets filled with clothes, much of it never worn, and knick-knacks, many unused.

The very day I arrived for my year-long stay in Germany, I knew I’d be forced to confront and reconsider my own habits of consumption. I quickly learned that minimalism isn’t just about living with less. It’s about making room for more of what really matters. I’m pleased to share some of the lessons learned from this experience of downsizing. I’ve been able to find more time and space for what matters most – the things I’m passionate about and the experiences that bring me closer to an understanding of my divine purpose.

So, here goes.

Lesson 1: Buy Only What You Can Carry Home

I lived in a 6th floor apartment in a beautiful pre-war building. You know, the kind with lots of windows (for letting in natural light) and no elevator. I developed the habit of only buying what I could comfortably carry home, up five flights of stairs. This meant buying less and making multiple trips to the grocery store in a week. Now that I’m back in the States, I try to maintain this mentality because it prevents impulsive buying. It really comes in handy when I’m at those big-box, super-saver stores that stock everything under one roof!

Lesson 2: Carpool

It’s not uncommon for Europeans to carpool with complete strangers. They even have websites, similar to Craigslist, that allow folks to post their trips and the number of open seats they have available for the ride. Coming from California, where it seems everyone has at least one car, the idea of this totally blew me. But I learned that it makes perfect sense, once you put your pride aside. Why not ride with someone and split the costs, especially for long distance trips? I can’t say how many times my girlfriends and I have gone someplace, the four or five of us arriving in separate vehicles! For safety’s sake, I still wouldn’t carpool with strangers. Yet, I have learned to be a lot less shy about the whole “can I get a ride” thing.

Lesson 3: Modesty is Sexy

This is not only a lesson learned in minimalism. It also relates to cold weather living and mindful dressing. I watched chic German women maintain their sexy through the long winter season while covered from head to toe. I discovered this culture of understated femininity where form-flattering turtlenecks, eye-opening mascara and waist-high trousers reign supreme. No punchy eyeshadow, trendy handbags, or statement accessories needed. It’s all about mixing conservatism with classics and basics for a wonderfully becoming wardrobe, instead of doing an overhaul in favor of the season’s biggest trends.

Lesson 4: More Experiences. Fewer Things.

Each of the friends I made in Europe had a rich past experience of travel that, in the States, is typically reserved for the well-to-do. The secret, I found, is not in having more money. Rather, it’s about leading a simple lifestyle and splurging on the experiences that enrich our understanding of the world. I watched a young couple lock up their humble one bedroom flat, headed for a one month winter holiday retreat in Denmark. My sweet university-aged friend, who lived at home with her parents and did not own a car, returned from spring break refreshed, after having spent a week in the Mediterranean (Mallorca) with her brother and cousins. It’s a tradition they’ve kept since the youngest of them turned sixteen.

Having seen this for myself, I feel I have an important choice to make when the latest gadget, perfume or platform shoe is released: to buy? Or to save for that South American expedition I’ve been dreaming of?

Lesson 5: Live Small

Small is the name of the game in most European urbanscapes. If you’ve ever shopped at Ikea, you probably have an idea of what I’m alluding to. Small are the cars and the kitchen cabinets. Small is every home appliance, shower and stairway. I practiced being more selective of the things I purchased and the junk I hung on to simply because there was no space for excess. It’s kind of like switching to a smaller purse. Inevitably, some of the things you’d normally carry around just have to go.

Now, whenever I find myself feeling “too big” for my surroundings, I immediately look for things I can get rid of. As I work on healing the packrat within, I am really enjoying this clutter-free way of living. It’s a one-way street toward the freedom of having more brain space and energy to dedicate to my work, relationships, and dreams.

***

Pilar Harris is a healthy lifestyle blogger who is passionate about vegetarianism, travel, books and black womanhood. She is a twenty-something healthy lifestyle advocate in the making who loves hip hop music as much as she loves steamed cauliflower and independent bookstores. Stop by her humble web home, Pilar in Motion and say hi on Twitter @pilarinmotion.

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How to Decide the Next Step in Your Career

Identify Your Signature Strengths

Two Ways to Set Effective Goals (VIDEO)

Be specific. (What exactly do you want to achieve?)

How to Overcome the Fear of Success

Look Before You Leap: 4 Steps to Take Before You Quit Your Job to Work for Yourself

How to Break Free: My Nitty-Gritty Advice for Living the Life You Really Want (AUDIO)

Five Ways to Expand Your Social Circle and Connect with Like-Minded Women

1. Attend local networking events.

2. Go to retreats and seminars.

3. Find a Meetup group related to a hobby or interest you have.

4. Join a book club.

5. Host an informal get-together at your home.

***

How to Create an Inspiring Morning Routine

3 Ways to Stay Motivated and Productive on the Journey to Achieve Your Goals

1. Commit to doing just one thing per week.

2. Give yourself rewards and incentives for reaching certain milestones.

3. Find an accountability partner.

***

How to Make Powerful Decisions

Challenge Yourself to Think Less and Do More

Remember That Baby Steps are Still Steps

Believe Success is Possible for You (Even if You’ve Failed in the Past)

***

The Art of Minimalism: 5 Things Germany Taught Me About Living With Less

Lesson 1: Buy Only What You Can Carry Home

Lesson 2: Carpool

Lesson 3: Modesty is Sexy

Lesson 4: More Experiences. Fewer Things.

Lesson 5: Live Small

***

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